I went to get some soup at a new “restaurant” downtown. The reason I say “restaurant” is because it has tables and chairs but you have to order your food at your counter and then you get herded to the other side of the counter like a cow.
—–> Just like that
“Restaurant” without the italics would be giving it far too much credit. I walked up to the counter and said
“Hi, Which one of your soups has no pieces in it?” (Reminder: I am on a liquid/with particle diet 🙂
*The lady behind the register looked at me, confused.
I knew I would have to explain my current situation to her.
“It’s just….I had jaw surgery and I can’t chew anything…it can have little pieces but I just can’t chew.”
The lady’s eyes got so wide, she looked absolutely terrified (and I know it wasn’t my face she was reacting to, I happen to have worn makeup on this cold day, I looked presentable) she turned to her co-worker at the other register, whispering in her ear. *Middle school flashback* THEY ARE TOTALLY TALKING ABOUT ME.
“What did you have done?” said the co-worker, perplexed. She was interested. I’m a rare species apparently and she wants to investigate before I can order.
I told her it was jaw surgery and asked my question again. The two ladies turned to each other and began discussing the soups, a line begins to form next to me. The next person in line just stood there staring at my jaw.
“Vegetable would be good for her, right?”
“No, the vegetable has vegetables in it”
(One of these ladies is definitely trying to kill me with her chunky soup. I have to be careful at this point.)
“French onion soup might work?”
“Fine” I answered back, “that sounds really good!” I decided I would bring it home and just blend it. This was the first thing I would eat that day, I was very hungry!
I thought I was in the clear until they began to ask questions..
“What did they do, did it hurt?”
(the person next in line is irked, she’s hungry and does not want to wait any longer)
I smiled and said “yea, it hurt a lot, especially after” to which the lady smiled, and (I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP,) goes
“Oh, I have a baby, I bet it’s not as bad.”
Oh yeah! Of course not, because yu know, having a baby is very similar to having your bones cracked and replaced. I see the similarities.
I smiled and thanked her.
**My French Onion soup was heavenly by the way.
I almost forgot the reason for my title! The question above has been a reoccurring theme in my rare outings, when I decide to get dressed and stop watching Nip/Tuck with my cat.
When someone hears of my surgery a large percent (ALL MEN) look at me and go,”oh, how long do you have to wear those?”
Those what? I’m confused, I stare back at them….The screw and hook jutting out of my bone? Or do you mean the elastic bands that tie my jaw shut so it doesn’t fall off my face?(exaggeration) Or is it the braces? Or no wait, is it the titanium pieces in my face, cause get what, those are permanent…that’s right, they are in there…foreverrrrrrrrr.
*Obviously, I politely answer their question even though the above, is running through my head.
Theres no “get better” comment, or questions that actually matter. No. It’s “how long do you have to wear those?” Next time, I’m going to scare them away and answer with “Why? Do they bother you? Is the light reflecting off my metal hook and blinding you?”
Feels good to vent. And let me just say, that from all you readers, I like all your lovely questions. There’s a difference between knowing the whole story and then asking for details. My jaw and I are very sensitive to newcomers and their nosy questions, takes us a while to get used to people.
Almost forgot, here are my pictures for today. My photographer wasn’t available so I did them myself!